Why Religion Cannot Satisfy Itself in God

There’s a humorous story of a young Christian girl who wanted a husband so badly that she sat in her house day dreaming about a thief breaking in who would take one look at her and decide to love her instead of steal from her.

It’s humorous because it’s ridiculous. But wait a moment—it’s not as absurd as it may sound because a lot of people live this way, as if God intended us to only use our spiritual senses to exist in a human world with human need.

The question begs to be asked. Can our humanity separate from our spirituality?

Can we pretend to be needless in an area God purposefully designed us to have need? And if we try, what happens? I’ve seen so called “Christian” beliefs lead to absolute perversion as religious groups teach things the Bible never taught.

When God-given humanity is caged in with extra Biblical rules, it becomes perverted in a desperate effort to be un-caged. What was meant to be “holy” is now worse than the world, and religious groups find themselves bewildered as they deal with sin of a grosser nature than many non-believers would even desire to attempt.

What then does it mean to be satisfied in God, as Augustine says? “Oh Lord, our hearts are restless until they find their rest in Thee.”

Christians are notorious for pretending human feelings and need are to be ignored, unrecognized, and spiritualized. But what if our body, soul, and spirit are so entwined that one affects the other—and God created all of it?

God does not condemn our humanity—He created it! What if the longings we have are placed there by Himself, and acknowledging them is healthier than denying them?

Being satisfied in God doesn’t always mean denying human need. Rather, it means worshiping Him whether or not those needs are met.

Being content in God doesn’t mean living without our needs being met. Rather, it means seeking to fulfill our needs when possible, but being content when it is not possible or in line with His will for us.

Being whole doesn’t mean pretending we don’t need others in our lives. Rather, it means that when we lose those we love, we are able to grieve as those who have hope rather than fall into despair as those who have no hope.

In all things, we ask God, “How did you create me? What plan did you have for me? Why do I desire this so strongly?”

Our need for romantic love is only one area, but I’ll focus on this one since it is relevant to almost everyone.

When my ex husband left and dated a 16 year old girl, my own need for love did not diminish. What did it mean to be satisfied in God during that time?

It did not mean pretense, that I was okay when I was breaking, that I didn’t care when in fact, I cared more about my marriage than anything else I could think of. It didn’t mean denial. It didn’t mean turning into one of those “Who needs a man?” kind of a woman.

What it did mean was that I let God speak to me about His love.

I let God tell me what boundaries I needed.
I refused to date for the three long years such a complicated divorce took.

Being satisfied in God meant that when others told me to go find a hot date, I told them my conscience would not allow it because I was a married woman.

Being satisfied in God meant that I acknowledged before God that I was living in ways He created me not to have to live. That the burden I felt on my shoulders was not planned by Him. That I didn’t have to pretend to be okay with something He wasn’t okay with, and I didn’t have to pretend I didn’t need my husband to be faithful when God Himself needed His daughters to be cared for by faithful men.

And years later, being satisfied in God meant asking God what He wanted for me, not passively, but purposefully.

Being satisfied in God means obedience to God, not passive existence. I see Christians in denial, passivity, and discontentment leading to longevity of depression and despair as they cage themselves to an existence God never asked of them.

Instead, lets ask ourselves, “Who did God create me to be?” Then, let’s reach out to pursue what that is—all the while, making sure our desires are in line with His word and scripture. If they are not, being satisfied in God means saying no.

God’s no is always in line with His better yes.

But very often, the things we deny ourselves of are actually things God created us to have. When we turn away from the gifts of God, we turn away from an aspect of God’s heart for us. In turn, we become miserably religious with no joy. Our “spirituality” is no longer spiritual, but carnal.

Denying ourselves brings joy when God is truly saying no, but when He’s offering us gifts, we live in abundant life by pursuing and accepting them.

In this process, let no religious person tell you you’re not “holy enough” because true holiness doesn’t impose anything but God’s heart and God’s best on others.

I’m not talking a selfish or sinful pursuit of happiness here. There is no freedom in sin and no joy in selfishness. But we there is also no freedom in religious rules that God didn’t create. Our own rules for “holiness” bring havoc. Both—and I’m here to repeat, BOTH—rob us of God’s abundant life.

Hear me carefully—hard is not always holy. Hard is holy when God asks it if you—but it is no more holy than finding delight and joy in a season of gifts, rest, and pure blessing.

In the end, being satisfied in God is a dance to the rhythm of His heart. When He says no, it always means yes to something better. But when He says yes, there also could be nothing better. And I’m here to ask Christians everywhere, “What longing do you have that God wants you to pursue?”

We pursue classes for cooking, training for business, college courses for becoming and doing things we’re good at. But when it comes to those internal longings of the heart, we suddenly sit on our hands and do nothing at all to position ourselves, expecting miracles to float from the sky because nothing else is “content” or “spiritual” enough.

I think God lets us sit in our religious ideas sometimes, trying in vain to convince ourselves that we are both happy and holy when we are neither.

Religion is a cage, often resulting in cult-like ideas of control. Relationship is a rhythm to God’s own heart, setting us free.

Maybe God wants to set us free from false ideas of holiness? Maybe He wants us to pursue the things we long for rather than force ourselves into a false contentment God never asked us to fabricate.

What if one of the greatest keys to abundant life is to accept His gifts, and even pursue them?

All in His time, in line with His will and Word, and by His grace.